still nervous

Temp went down, again, today to 98.26 and my test with FMU was not darker.  After some serious comparing it's still darker than anything from last month.  But I'm still scared.  I was hoping to see a darker line.  I know I should stop temping and testing, but I took that route last time and it still ended in loss.  I figure what have I got to lose this time around?  But I might end up stressing myself out more than I need to be stressed out.  Ughhh  I just hope that tomorrows appointment results in nice high beta numbers.

So without further ado...today's test

 Progression

still testing...

and I'm going to continue testing until I see a line as dark as the control line and/or I get really good beta numbers.

Dollar store test taken midday after holding my urine for only 45 mins.  Still darker than last time.

Progession

in disbelief

OMG I don't f'n believe it...

Stick baby STICK!!!!!

pretty sure I'm out

Major temp drop this morning, 97.92 from 98.62.  I have some cramping going on.  I'm sure the witch is knocking on my Thanksgiving door.  Well, I guess this is done and I'm out of the running this cycle and probably indefinitely.  Happy Fucking Thanksgiving! I'm about ready to stay in bed all day and say screw all the stress makers in my life, including the damn out-laws I'm supposed to be spending time with.  I haven't spent a Thanksgiving with my own family in years and I'm starting to get resentful.

the gods are against me

So the ICs I was waiting on...didn't show up at my office till 4PM, a whole hour after my office was closed.  I even left the office at 3:15, so I tried to wait it out but I wanted to get my script for progesterone.  Well, wouldn't you fucking know it, I couldn't get the damn script filled.  My OB forgot to put instructions on how to use it, and didn't call back the pharmacist back, so they couldn't fill it.  FUCKING SHIT!!!! WHAT THE FUCK?! WHY IS IT ALL AGAINST ME RIGHT NOW!!!  FUCKING BITCH!


Ok I feel better now.


I only have the one IC left, so now I'm really not sure if I want to waste the test or not. Dayum!!!  I guess I'll just wait and see what the morning brings.  If temps are still high, it might be worth the test.  I can see if a dollar store is open tomorrow.  If not, then I guess I can try and go to my office on Friday to get them, I do have to go into the City anyway this weekend.  Why not hit the art museum while everyone else is shopping?

scared and nervous

OK so I put in the script for the progesterone just in case...I'm due for AF tomorrow or by Monday the latest.  If I go off of my normal 27 day cycle, tomorrow is due day.  However, if I follow my LP length, then I'm not due until Sunday, possibly Monday.  I'm sure I O'd around CD 15 or 16, possibly 14, but I wasn't temping so I'm not sure.  So now the question becomes, do I test or do I wait???? 

A part of me wants to wait cause I'm scare it's going to be another "chemical."  But another part of me wants to test because if it's positive, then I want to start the progesterone asap and get a beta done on Monday.  Oy vey! This is so confusing and frustrating.  


My temps are still pretty high, but again, if I go by DPO date, they're in the normal range.  If I go by CD then they're still high and I normally drop by now.  See my dilemma? :(

tired

That's how I feel. Just plain old tired.  I'm ready to take a nap right now.  If only I could.  But nope today is a long day, work followed  by two classes.  I won't be home till about 9PM.  YAY ME!!!!